Sunday Rants by Val #53

 

1. Mum: Zoba, you are going back on Monday?

Me: Yes ma.

Mum: Give me the list of what you would need.

Me: (Tears 2 sheets of foolscap)

Mum: 👀

Me: shey I was chilling on na own you went and born me. (Na for my mind I said it oo)🏃🏾🏃🏾

2. Qstn- Arm Robber gave you a gun and told you to shoot either your mum or your wife, who would you shoot?

Me- I will shoot the arm robber. 😎

#Sense.

3. So if I get married now my wife would tell me to come and join her in the bathroom let’s bath together? 🙆🏾‍♂

Me that is very shy, I would jes cover myself with towel.😹

4. 30 men can ride one bike without knowing each other… Do you understand or should I go depeer??😉

5. I just realized I’m Related to DANGOTE!!!!

His Mother And My Mother Are Both Mothers.👌🏾

6. When a girl is not interested in a relationship anymore, she can say anything just to break up with you…she will be like ..

“Baby I can’t continue this relationship I just found out your father did not write NECO”😂

7. Where Are those mother’s calling me my inlaw wen i was A kid and I would b shying?…Plz bring dat ur daughter now.. I am no longer shy Now😎😌

8. He calls u “my angel”but he only invites you at

night,my sister are you an angel of darkness?

Am just asking ooo💁🏾‍♂🌚

9. In abroad, if you sell your soul to the devil you will become rich instantly. But in Africa, hmm, you will sell your soul, your mother, your father, and even your friends but you will still run mad before seeing your money… African gods una discipline too much😃🧐

10. Africans never rest, even after death they still work as ancestor😆

11. Sometimes Marriage is just like admission, you will be aspiring UNIBEN, UNN, UNIJOS and UNIZIK, but you will end up in Alvan Ikoku College of Education Owerri.😆🤣

12. Jacob used a stone as pillow and saw a vision, and Samson used Delilah’s thigh as pillow and loss his vision… moral lesson: be mindful of what you use as pillow*

 

Happy Sunday

#HopeunagoChurch?

Val