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Sunday Rants by Val EXCLUSIVE

#Sunday Rants

Different kind of people you meet in Nigerian Church.

1.The Ushers that you don’t know what there problem is, they are always mean, always disturbing you for sleeping in your father’s house.

Nawao, is it your father’s house? Is it your sleeping?

2.The ones that even if they are the first to come Church, they will never sit in front😎

3. The ones that naturally loves Church, they love being in God’s presence, they always break down during worship

4. The ones that are always busy writing down something during sermon as if its MTH 121 class. They might not even read it later.

5. The ones that doesn’t know the difference btw Church and party house, they dress anyhow, always dancing in a worldly manner.

are you ok?

5. The ones you notice they are doing everything possible to catch your eye…sisi if you like me tell me after service I’m nt hard to get

Stop giving me holy smile😜

6. The ones that shout unnecessarily during sermon. If you check well they are just using style to fight sleep

7. The ones that normally sleep during sermons, if you wake them up, they will start muttering Prayers…Bro Prayer is not going on, goan give your offering biko😂

8. The ones that doesn’t play with sermon, they pay rapt attention like their life depended on it.

Its good shaa👍

9. The boys that normally disobey the Ushers just to sit down beside that fine sisi👦

10. The beautiful female ushers that will be smiling and welcoming you like they know you from somewhere.

I Love these girls😍

11. That beautiful girl you always admire, you really want to talk to her, but unfortunately she comes with her parents.

Bad market😥

12. The old papas and mamas that always give funny testimonies, from testimony they will start giving you motherly/fatherly advice.

13. The ones that has sworn that the Church will never see their one Naira. During offering they will sit back. Bro are you the only citizen of this hard country?

14. The ones that always mind their business, they come late and sometimes leave before closure.

15. The young cute couple that normally comes in matching outfit. They will make you look forward to getting married.

Chai mine is like ten yrs to come o

16. The ones that look forward to “greet five people” or “hold your neighbour” so they can goan touch their crush. leme greet my sisters biko.

17. The f**k boys that came to church because a girl invited them…

Since she wants it by Church way…they will start coming to Church and may even join choir. bahd guyz

18. That brother that will always approach you after service, saying its been long he saw you in Church, asking about your Christian life…

Bro, please I appreciate. Allow me to go home and eat, i dey Hungry😬

What number are you???




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