#Sunday Rants.

1. I Am tired of this country,Imagine I bought corn yesterday and the seller begged me to cut for her.??

2. A foolish wife slaps her husband when angry.A wise wife waits for a mosquito to perch on his cheek.Then WHAM! She kills it there.??

3. You’ve dated almost 30 guys and you broke up with them because none of them understood you…Hanty sorry ooo leme ask, are you further maths ???

4. Me : Babe, where are you and what are you doing??

Gf : I’m at home dear, frying plantain.

Me : Oya fry one lemme hear.??

5. How can I buy a pair of shoes for 30k and you Expect me to walk on the ground?? Abeg if you hear any sound on ur roof don’t panic na me dey waka so…..??

6. I was owing MTN 5000. I broke the sim and bought another one, after registration I received a massage. ‘U AGAIN!!!’ ?

7. I pay 80k to sleep in Sharaton hotel and you say I should not urinate on the bed….. You well at all??? ??‍♂?

8. Being ugly is not easy, you will snap 80 pics delete 75, Edit 5 post 1 Chai Lord have mercy am ur son ooo….??‍♂?

9. Sister!!..if you have flat boobs, flat yansh, and even flat tummy,  congratulations my sister your three bedroom flat is complete.??

10. Today I almost fought with conductor I was shouting I will beat him up, I will treat his fuckup, I will remove his eyes but deep down my mind I was praying let passengers separate us oo before I die and thank God they did. ??????

11.Babe: Val can I have your phone? I wantu use your calculator?

Me: Sure, its on the table over there.

Babe: Who is Cynthia?

Me: I don’t know oo, maybe it’s square root of 20 ??

12. Some girls will make you feel special, until you realize she talk the same way to other guys.?

13. If you ever feel like sleeping but sleep seems no where near your eyes, just close your eyes and count from1000 to 0 backwards. Trust me you should fell asleep before you reach zero. But if you don’t, sorry o your case pass me.?

14. My side chick told me to shave my bie bie, but that’s not the problem oo, the problem is that my girlfriend I mean my real girlfriend loves touching it?

15. What If Your Whole Life Is A Dream and You’re presently a Primary 2 student sleeping in the Class????

*Money is the root of all evil; yes but poverty is an evil forest*

Happy Sunday

#HopeunagoChurch?

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#Val